Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Go with the Flow

Saturday afternoon, I officiated Alana and Colby’s wedding ceremony at Hotel ZaZa, in Houston, Texas. Here are the remarks I shared with them and their guests:
 
 
I ask every person I marry to write an autobiographical essay about themselves. When I run across a sentence in such an essay that says, “I’ll never forget the day,” I pay extra close attention to what the person tells me next.
 
Here is how Colby describes the day he will never forget: “I was struggling with which direction life was taking me, trying to decide between going back to College for a second Bachelor’s Degree in Engineering, going to work for Lockheed Martin as a Financial Analyst, or finishing up my law school applications. It was that morning... when my spirituality changed from religion and ritual to going with the flow of life. My mom told me to not fight life, that I would never know which direction life would take me, who I would meet, or what challenges lay ahead.  She told me to go with the flow of life, not fight my love for math and go back to school for Engineering.”
 
Wow. Is that profound or what? I find it to be, not only profound, but especially meaningful and refreshing, in this highly goal-oriented society, where there seems to be a pressure to always look forward, never look back, and keep climbing the professional ladder regardless of how it feels.
 
Colby took this approach to his first date with Alana, and immediately found a kindred spirit. Alana describes who set them up, a great yenta in the cloud. No, not the clouds, the cloud: “We are very traditional. We met on match.com... We [then] met up... [in person]. We sat on the patio and enjoyed the fun ambiance and beautiful patio with firepits at each table, good drinks... and even better company. We had so much to talk about and were there for a few hours. While the frozen mojitos were pretty tasty, it really was Colby’s easygoing and loving nature, his charming good looks, intelligence and great sense of humor that captured my heart. I couldn’t wait for our second date!”
 
Now, Alana leaves out how going with the flow may have worked for her and Colby, but for her friends, not so much… Colby picks up the story: “At 11 Alana looked down at her phone and had missed around 100 text messages from her friends asking where she was! They were concerned about online dating, and that she hadn’t gotten back to them!”
 
It wasn’t long before Colby knew this was the one, who could go with the flow with him, long term: “I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with Alana, when I couldn’t imagine opening my eyes and not seeing her next to me every morning. She is my best friend, soul mate, lover, and adventurer. Life is chaotic, always moving in a million directions at a million miles an hour, but I know we’ll move in them together, through the ups and downs, and conquer them together.”
 
And Alana, cites this other guy who gave her the final proof that she had made the right decision. You may have heard of this other guy, who went by his first name only, Harvey. And, keep in mind, most of what Alana describes here, Colby only told her later: “I know he will support me through anything, and recent Hurricane Harvey is proof. He walked me to work through the flood waters, filled with fire ants and sewage water, walking ahead of me to make sure I didn’t fall through an open uncovered manhole into the sewers, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle style.”
 
Well, that gives a whole new meaning to, “going with the flow,” doesn’t it?! All that’s left for me to say is, cowabunga, let’s get to those vows!

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